


In Sickness and in Health

by osmalic



Category: D N Angel
Genre: Angst, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-02-17
Updated: 2003-02-17
Packaged: 2017-10-13 17:25:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/139807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/osmalic/pseuds/osmalic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Satoshi is sick. Daisuke takes care of him. Satoshi is very, very irritated.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Sickness and in Health

**Author's Note:**

> An attempt to write an in-character exchange between Hiwatari and Niwa, as well as exploring their other possible characters (therefore OOC). Some shonen ai, mostly between Dark and Satoshi, and Daisuke and Satoshi. But blink and you'll miss it.

Satoshi Hiwatari's body felt like lead, but when he woke up that morning he thought it was only because of his low blood-sugar, so he went on, going to the bathroom, brushing his teeth, taking a very warm bath to banish the cold temporarily, and take his notes and books from the kitchen table before shoving them uncharacteristically in his bag. But when he saw that the notes were on the floor instead of the bag pocket, realized that he was feeling more cold than normal, and that the room was spinning way out of control, he realized that something was wrong before he met the floor.

When he opened his eyes again, the skin below his right eye was scratched by his eyeglasses that was pressed between his face and the floor. He shivered again, wondering if he should get up and go back to bed or go on to school but when he raised his left wrist to see his watch, he saw that it was already 9 am, too late to go to school. So, with only one option left, he forced himself to get up and half-crawled, half-stumbled to bed.

He fell into the cool sheets once more, still shivering. He knew he was sick, felt it with his whole body. He didn't know how it came to him, probably because it had snowed the morning before and he, like a fool, had not brought a jacket so he had slushed back to his apartment, cold and wet in his uniform. He had eaten a sandwich and had fallen into bed, not waking until this morning. He had fainted on the floor, he realized suddenly, and this made him angry but he was too tired to care anyway, so he slept again.

He woke up once more at 1 pm, and he thought about getting lunch. However, only his arms seemed to obey him so he closed his eyes again, thinking that when he could move, he should get the aspirins in the bathroom. It only seemed logical: he was sick and he needed medicine. He agreed to himself, vaguely realizing that he was talking to no one, and went back to sleep.

Sometime during his slumber, he felt a warm touch over his forehead and without thinking he leaned into that warmth but it was gone like a thought and a small sound escaped from his lips before he could help it but he fell asleep once more.

The next time he opened his eyes, the room was darkened but a glance at the closed drapes showed that it was still light outside and that it was snowing again. He squinted, feeling so desperately tired, so he closed his eyes to doze off once more.

Only there was a crash at the direction of the kitchen.

He struggled to open his eyes once more, body protesting as he stood from the bed, fumbling for anything to hold on to. He was uncoordinated, and meeting a thief was probably the last thing his tired body needed but he was damned if he was going to let this get off without a fight. Honestly, though, he felt like he needed a crutch.

He actually made it a few steps towards the door when it flew open and an unexpected figure stood at the frame, holding a tray and a cup that he recognized as it used to be in the kitchen next to his mug, and that he had bought it on a whim because it was blue and looked convenient, one of the few things with color in his spotlessly white kitchen...but never mind about the cup. He stared motionlessly at the figure before him but the said person was already at his side, holding on to his arm and guiding him back to the bed.

It offended Satoshi that _this person_ actually saw him in his most helpless time, not to mention seemed to be having no notion of letting him return to bed on his own. Granted that his legs were still wobbly and that he probably needed guide since his head was spinning, he was still angry.

But the hand soothed him again and he felt a warm blanket cover his body, still in rumpled uniform, and he fell once more into the blessed darkness.

When he woke up once more, it seemed like hardly a moment had passed but a look at the window showed that it must have been an hour or more. The sun was setting but the snow had not stopped.

But there was the person at the door, and Satoshi felt well enough to croak out pathetically, "What are you doing?"

Daisuke Niwa stopped whatever he was doing in the dimly lit corner of his room and replied, "Nothing," before shoving what seemed to be a paper into his bag, which rested at his feet by the chair. He stood and went to his side, kneeling beside him. "You're sick."

"What are you doing here?" Satoshi asked, even though he felt like sleeping again.

Niwa shrugged, smiling uncertainly. "You were absent today Teacher told me to bring you your homework and some papers. I knocked but no one answered so I thought about leaving it inside. But when I got in, your bag was knocked over and the coffee table seemed out of order, not to mention that your fax machine kept printing. I thought maybe something was wrong and I found you passed out on the bed, without even a blanket, and you were shivering so I moved you and wrapped you in a quilt. I hope you're warm enough, I suppose you haven't taken your medicine?"

Satoshi had been listening to him all the while, despite wishing that he was well enough to stop him from talking. He need not hear the pathetic story of how Niwa had discovered him half-kneeling on the floor. He had not even known he had moved the coffee table but then he was half-asleep when he went to bed. He closed his eyes, not wanting to listen anymore.

But a hand was on his face, touching his cheek and he turned away instinctively, refusing to be touched. There was a silence, and then Niwa's voice: "Don't sleep for a while, you need to take your medicine."

"Aspirin," he mumbled.

He heard Niwa give a laugh. "No. Those won't do for a high fever...I have something here. Trust me."

So Satoshi found himself sitting up once more and taking the pill that Daisuke Niwa offered him and drinking the water from the cup that he had noted earlier. Then, he fell back into sleep once more, burrowing himself deeper into the blanket, wondering if he woke that it would all just be a dream.

* * *

It was dark when he woke up and he was alone. He sighed and looked around. The room was empty and slightly warm...if Niwa was indeed here earlier, he must have left. If he wasn't there in the first place, then it wouldn't be the first time Satoshi had seen him in his room, in his apartment, and discovered when he awoke that it had never happened. He shivered again, then felt his stomach turn. Weakly, he kicked the heavy blankets out of place (where did they come from?) and rushed as fast as he could to the direction of the bathroom. He stumbled once and half-crawled to the toilet.

But there was someone beside him again and Satoshi was too sick to care that Niwa was still there and was holding on to his body as he retched into the toilet. Niwa's warm hands were on his waist and back, rubbing soothing circles he he clutched at the rim. His body was too weak, his mind was too weak, and Niwa--Niwa was witnessing it all. Dark must have...he banished the idea, wishing he had the ability to cry, to moan, but all that came out was a small whimper and he feebly shoved Niwa away before pushing himself up at the sink to wash his face. Behind him, Niwa was flushing the toilet.

"You...that wasn't supposed to happen," Niwa said in confusion.

"What?" Satoshi mumbled around a mouthful of water that he was spitting. He grabbed his toothbrush and toothpaste and began to brush his teeth.

"Your throwing up," Niwa replied in a rush, as if he was truly concerned. "You should be okay by now...your temperature has gone down but you weren't supposed to throw up."

"Thank you for repeating," the other said and rinsed his mouth. Niwa rushed to get a towel which he offered to Satoshi and the boy took it without a word, wiping his face and lips before marching as decently as he could back to his bed.

He reclined over the mattress and turned his back to the redhead, who was still standing at the bathroom door, as if undecided and thinking. He supposed he knew what Niwa-kun was doing, and he expected it, so he closed his eyes again.

Then, came his voice, urgent and uncomfortably near him. "Have you eaten?"

"Go away," Satoshi mumbled, clutching the blanket tighter around his body.

There was an annoying disturbance as Niwa shook him softly. "Hiwatari-kun, I need to know if you already ate."

"I don't have to tell you." Satoshi wished he'd just go. He didn't need anyone, not really, and he supposed this sickness would pass and hopefully, Niwa-san would be too preoccupied with his other businesses that he would soon forget that he had seen Satoshi Hiwatari in his most wretched state so Satoshi would still have some of his dignity and self-respect left. Fat chance, he supposed.

"Did you eat?!" Niwa's voice was in the verge of hysteria and Satoshi was alarmed so he growled out, "No."

"Since when?"

He hoped this would shut him up. "Last night."

"Hiwatari-kun!"

Then, the presence was gone and he heard Niwa run into the hallway towards God knows what direction. He was too tired to look and too sick to care and he closed his eyes once more to return to his sleep.

* * *

Daisuke Niwa could not imagine how a person who looked like he was born from snow could be so warm to the touch and at the same time be so impossible cold. He couldn't imagine how anybody, normal or not, could live alone in this horridly spotless apartment and he shivered as he looked at the walls, bereft of paintings. The few ones were beautiful, though, and when Hiwatari-kun had slept, Daisuke had taken a closer look at one of the paintings and found that it was signed with Satoshi's name. The date was only a year ago.

At Dark's insistence, Daisuke found out why Hiwatari-kun had thrown up--his body couldn't take the pill because he had not eaten. It was probably one of the reasons why he was sick, so Daisuke was hoping it would bring his fever down a bit.

But first, he should check. He picked up the phone and dialled his number, letting it ring for a long time before it was picked up by Towa-chan, who happily asked him where he was. He asked for his mother and he could practically see the woman pout at his silence. A few minutes later, his mother was at the phone.

"Daisuke-chan!" his mother said. "Where have you been, we've been waiting!"

He sighed. He had called earlier to say he would be late but now, it seemed like there was no other choice. "I'm at a classmate's house."

"A classmate?" She sounded completely curious. "How...cute. Daisuke, the snow is falling very hard. If you don't come home now, we'll have to dig you up when the snow stops and I very well don't like the image of your father and I digging in the snow to get you!"

He smiled at the idea. "No, Mom, I know. Hiwatari-kun--"

"Did you say 'Hiwatari'?" she interrupted, sounding more alarmed.

"Yeah."

"Come home this instant!" she shrieked. "I'm getting Wiz to take you!"

"Mom!" he protested.

"Not another word!"

Daisuke twirled the cord with a finger. "But he's very sick," he objected, feeling uncomfortable. "I found him passed out half on the bed, half on the floor, and he hasn't eaten and he has a very high temperature and he's been throwing up. There's no one at home and if no one takes care of him, I'm very sure he'll get worse and I'll feel very guilty!" This all came out in a rush and he wondered where it came from.

His mother, for once, was silent for a very long time. "Is Dark with you?" she asked finally.

"Mom! Of course he is, where else would he be?" Daisuke paused. "Does this mean I can stay?"

"Just be back tomorrow," his mother replied, sounding unhappy. "I want you to call every hour--"

"MOM!"

"Every other hour, then," she amended. "And take care."

"All right." He paused again, then went on, "What should I feed him?"

She clucked her tongue. "I find it hard to believe that the boy has no one taking care of him. But I'll humor you for once and tell you that you should give him hot broth and soup. If he's warm to the touch, put a towel soaked in rubbing alcohol and water on his forehead and wipe his body. When he finishes eating, give him a pill and let him sleep."

"Thanks, Mom," he said warmly. "I'm glad you understand."

She made another "hmph"-ing sound and replied unhappily, "I guess there's nothing more to be done. But," she rushed, "you _will_ call, won't you?"

"Goodnight, Mom." He put down the phone before she could protest and went to open the cupboard. Earlier, he had seen canned food at one side and noodles in the other, so he went for the noodles. He looked inside the refrigerator and saw bread, cheese, toast. He frowned in distaste. Noodles only, he supposed. And warm milk. He looked around again and found powdered milk at the far end of the cupboard. When he learned that it was still good, he proceeded and put the food on the tray and brought it to the room.

The room was darker now and the figure burrowed on the bed was breathing normally, not noticing him. Hiwatari-san was asleep. Daisuke nudged the tray on the bedside table and went to get some alcohol and water, pouring them into a basin he found in the bathroom. He rummaged around the closet and found a small towel that he soaked into the liquid, squeezed, and put on Hiwatari's forehead. The sleeping boy murmured and barely shifted.

When he was finished, Daisuke went to sit at the corner of the room once more, settling on the chair where he sat earlier. Peering out of the window revealed more falling snow and darkness broken only by a faint light of the lamppost...and the whiteness. He smiled.

Then, he felt his eyelids droop and he looked at Hiwatari-san once more. The other boy had not turned during the last time Daisuke saw him; he must be exhausted. Wondering what must have caused the sickness, he fell into sleep.

* * *

Satoshi awoke at complete darkness, except for the thin light from the lamppost outside. He struggled to sit up, stopping when he saw his view shake and spin so he waited until it stopped. Niwa-kun was again at the corner, sleeping and Satoshi scowled. He knew that the chair was uncomfortable, so why on earth was Niwa sitting there, much more, sleeping on it? The couch was in the living room and he could have slept there. If Niwa knew where the blankets were (of course he found out, that's why Satoshi had another extra blanket) then he would have been taken care of.

He turned to his side and felt his resolves soften. On the bedside lay a tray. He touched the noodles...still warm. He reached out, feeling his stomach rumble at the sight and his fingernails clinked at the glass of milk beside it.

It was only a small sound but Niwa shot up and quickly hurried to his side. "Nonono! Don't hold it--let me!"

Satoshi's arms fell over his lap and he watched as Niwa deftly picked up the bowl, avoiding getting his fingers burnt. He turned to Satoshi. "Open your mouth."

The other boy blinked. _Surely_ Niwa-kun did not mean to feed him! But here he was, holding a spoonful of soup, looking determined put the spoon in his mouth as much as Satoshi was determined to hold on to his stubborness. He clenched his jaw. It hurt. "No."

"Come on, Hiwatari-kun!" Niwa encouraged, leaning closer. "Just one bite and you'll feel better--"

"No."

"Hiwatari-kun!"

Satoshi shook his head and felt himself collapse back into the headboard in dizziness, muttering a curse. At this, a spoon was shoved into his mouth, almost choking him as he swallowed the tasty broth. The spoon was out of his mouth in a second and he ended up coughing. Niwa put down the broth once more and stared at him in concern while he tried to compose himself, still angry. Why on earth did this happen to him, of all people? "What were you trying to do, feed me or kill me?" he snapped in his best intimidating voice. It did not work and Niwa-kun was not impressed.

"You should be asking yourself that question," he replied easily. "Let's not make this difficult for the both of us, Hiwatari-san. You need to eat and I'm here. Open your mouth." His voice brooked no arguments and Satoshi admitted defeat and did as he was told. After the noodles, he was given water and milk with the medicine before Niwa made him lie down once more.

He was tired again, and he was about to sleep when he remembered something. He struggled to open his eyes. "Why are you still here?"

Niwa-kun seemed surprised at the question. "Because no one will take care of you if I didn't stay."

"How can you pity a monster?" he mumbled, closing his eyes and shifting in his sheets before falling asleep, completely missing the puzzled look on Niwa's face.

* * *

From then on, he kept waking, being jolted awake dream after dream. A voice inside him (and he knew his name) whispered soothing words but he ignored them and slept once more, only to be awoken, struggling to cry out a name that he could not remember when he awoke.

And then, the next time he opened his eyes, the room was pitch black and there was a figure sitting beside him on the bed, watching him with curious eyes.

Satoshi stared at him owlishly, wishing he had his glasses. He felt naked without them and he shivered again, very, very cold.

Dark raised an eyebrow. "I'll be the first to tell you how stupid you are if you die because of this."

Satoshi did not have the strength to answer the question so he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "What are you doing here?"

"Taking care of you."

"Niwa-kun?"

He felt a smile on Dark's lips as he answered, "He was tired so I took over."

Satoshi somehow felt that it wasn't the correct reply but he did not question anymore. He settled into the mattress, not caring if it was Attila the Hun sitting at his bedside right now. He was too tired.

But then fingers drew the blanket away and were on his shirt before he could protest. His eyes flew open. "What are you doing?!" he snapped.

"Undressing you," Dark replied, then frowned. "You still have your uniform on."

 _"Dammit!"_ Satoshi cursed, flailing at him, trying to fight the hands that pushed his uniform away. "Get your hands off me!" He felt like spinning out of control--Dark could do this. He and Niwa-kun. They could say just one word that would make him do and say things he normally didn't do and would regret later. He bit his lip and kicked Dark at the side. "Let go!"

"Hi-wa-ta-ri," Dark admonished, grunting as a leg weakly connected to his side, "you're bathed in sweat and Emiko-chan said I have to wipe a cloth on you."

"Don't," Satoshi warned, but it came out more like a sob.

Dark caught his wrists and pinned him on the bed, leaning forward to let his nose touch Satoshi's. Satoshi could breathe his scent, a powerful and beautiful scent, mixed with that of Niwa-kun's and he began to breathe harder as Dark nuzzled his cheek. "What are you so afraid of?"

Satoshi turned his head away, scowling as Dark released him, hands quickly diving to the shirt and ripping them away. He started. "What--"

"You might put up a fight if I remove all buttons," Dark replied easily. "Just find another uniform. You want me to remove your pants for you?"

"Go to hell."

"Easier said than done." Without another word, Dark unzipped his pants and pulled them off in a blink of an eye. In less than five minutes, Satoshi found himself naked under the thick protection of the blankets. Dark grinned. "That wasn't so hard."

Satoshi thought otherwise but he closed his eyes.

"Are you tired?"

"Let me sleep," Satoshi mumbled, waving a hand away. Dark was touching his body under the blanket and he drew away, suddenly afraid, realizing he was helpless in this condition. Then, a cold touch was on his skin and he hissed, opening his eyes. _"Now_ what--?"

"Emiko-chan said so," Dark replied.

"Who is this Emiko-chan?" Satoshi growled, wondering if he should plan on having that person arrested.

"Daisuke's mother. She said this will bring your temperature down, so lie there and take it like a man." Dark was wiping his shivering body with the damp cloth that only succeeded in making him colder. "Haven't you ever been sick before?"

Satoshi closed his eyes and didn't answer.

"Huh. Not telling, are you?"

He thought about the last time he had been this sick. It was in the boarding school he had attended, and he had gone on to class as if nothing was happening to him. If it wasn't for one of his classmates who accidentally brushed his hand on his, he wouldn't have been brought to the school clinic where he spent the rest of the day, missing out on one subject. He had lain in bed sleeping, and when he awoke, he felt well enough to go outside, even if his temperature had not stabilized. In a few days, the fever was gone.

When Dark was finished, Satoshi opened his eyes again and stared at him, trying to fight the drowsiness that was overcoming his senses once more. "Why are you--why are you two doing this?" he asked in confusion.

Dark blinked at him, then reached out to touch his face gently, brushing some strands of hair away from his eyes. He was smiling. "Don't you want to ask Daisuke that?"

"What about you?"

Dark grinned and leaned forward, his forehead touching Satoshi's so that their eyes were so close to each other and their breaths mingled. "I like seeing you this way," he whispered.

Satoshi's face flushed.

Then, Dark went on, "Right where I want you, helpless and on the bed, depending on--"

"STOP IT!" Satoshi cut in before coughing violently. He moved away from Dark, facing the wall as the spasms subsided. His head hurt a lot and he felt himself getting giddy; he closed his eyes then, trying to make Dark disappear through sheer will. In a matter of minutes, his breathing had evened and he did not mind the figure who sat beside him, unconsciously touching his shoulder as he slept.

* * *

"Has his fever gone down yet?" his mother asked, barely suppressing a yawn.

Daisuke rubbed his eyes. "Un. He's still sick but at least he's not as warm as a while ago. I guess he's going to be okay."

"Make sure he drinks his medicine in four hours. And keep him warm. He might be having bouts of cold and since the fever will be releasing itself, always wipe his sweat and let him drink lots of water or juice. No coffee. He might cough a lot as the fever subsides."

Daisuke winced as there was a loud cough from the direction of Hiwatari's room. "Okay."

"You alright?"

"Yeah, Mom. Dark took over while I slept for a few hours. We'll be okay."

"Call me if you need me," his mother reminded him again and he nodded before he remembered that she could not see him.

"Okay." There was a loud crash in the direction of the room and Daisuke looked up, frowning. "Got to go, Mom." He put down the receiver amidst his mother's confusion and hurried to Hiwatari-kun's room, finding the sick boy tangled with white sheets and a robe, kneeling on the floor where the tray had fallen. Fortunately, the carpet had broken the fall of the empty glass and it had rolled near to Daisuke. He picked it up and put his hands on his waist.

"Hiwatari-kun," he started.

Hiwatari looked up at him, blinking owlishly. "Bathroom," he croaked out.

Daisuke went to his side and wound one of the other's arm around his neck, letting him lean on him as they took the short yet painfully agonizing trip towards the bathroom. There, Hiwatari sat on the toilet, closing his eyes and breathing hard. Daisuke stood beside him, watching the boy as he composed himself. Then, Hiwatari opened his eyes and requested, "Please close the door when you go out."

"Oh, right!" Daisuke blushed and hurried outside, doing as he was told. A few minutes later, Hiwatari emerged and he helped him again towards the bed.

"You must be exhausted," Hiwatari said as Daisuke rearranged the blankets and the tray.

Daisuke shook his head although he felt very tired. He smiled at Hiwatari. "I slept for a little while."

"Oh, yes," Hiwatari replied darkly, looking away momentarily before going on, "There's a couch in the living room. You can sleep there."

"But I have to stay near you," Daisuke protested, frowning at him. "I need to be here if you need me."

"I--" Hiwatari-kun seemed to swallow whatever he was going to say and replied weakly, "The chair isn't comfortable."

"I'll manage."

Hiwatari was silent for a while before he shifted and turned away from him. His voice was muffled by the pillow. "Sleep here, if you like."

Daisuke brightened. "Really?" Then, he blushed and shook his head. "Oh, no. I wouldn't. I shouldn't really, because you're sick and I might squish you or something, besides, I'm a restless sleeper and you might not be used to it--"

"Niwa-kun," Hiwatari-san said patiently, looking up at him through the darkness, "get into the bed."

"Y-yes." Daisuke kicked off his slippers and removed his uniform shirt, wearing only his pants and white undershirt. He slipped into the sheets beside Hiwatari, the mattress sighing under his weight, unused. He was frozen for a while, until he saw that Hiwatari wasn't moving: he probably fell asleep.

Daisuke sighed and closed his eyes. "Goodnight, Hiwatari-kun," he murmured, snuggling into the bed.

* * *

The bed was shaking when he woke up. Groaning, he opened his eyes and saw with the help of his wristwatch that it was still four AM, time for Hiwatari-kun's medicine. He rolled over to his side, wondering why the bed was shaking when he saw Hiwatari, huddled and facing the wall. He touched his shoulder. "Hiwatari-kun?"

Hiwatari only shook his head and coughed weakly. "Nothing. Go back to sleep."

"Uun." Daisuke sat up and went to the kitchen to fix a hot glass of milk and getting the pills. Eyes half-closed, he went back to the bedroom to see that Hiwatari was curled into a ball. He froze. "Hiwatari-kun!"

Hiwatari looked up at him, eyes intense and burning. "Please," he whispered, "get out."

"What?"

"Get--out--" he rasped, fingers clenched. The blanket was strewn around his body as if they were a part of each other. "Lock--lock the doors...leave me alone...go home."

"But the snow is around a meter high!" Daisuke protested, taking a step back.

 _"Dark!"_ Satoshi screamed. "Get him out for God's sake--get him out--!"

Suddenly, Daisuke's body snapped into attention and he felt his body grow numb as Dark steered him out of the room, cursing. It took Daisuke a few minutes to realize that he was tumbling headfirst into the hallway, hastily zipping his coat and parka over his body. He tried the elevator as he was putting on his boots and realized it wasn't opening--he rushed down the stairs.

"Dark!" Daisuke cried as he stumbled through the stairs. "What's going on?!"

 _"Run, Daisuke,"_ Dark urged. _"Don't think!"_

Daisuke felt a sob rise into his throat and realized it wasn't his own. He bit his lip; Dark was so close to breaking down. _"I don't need this I don't need this I don't need this,"_ Dark was repeating to himself and it made Daisuke's body cold.

When they fell over the wall of snow, Daisuke began to thrash, wondering what was going on, why his heart was beating erratically and he couldn't seem to catch his breath. _Dark, Dark, why...?!_ he cried out in his mind but the voice was eerily silent. Daisuke felt so alone, his cheeks felt frozen and he realized he was crying. He pushed against the snow, not knowing what he should do and what direction he should take. He felt so cold and he remembered the warmth of Hiwatari-kun's apartment, the smile he gave, and the violent trembling--

 _"DARK!"_ Daisuke screamed.

Suddenly, from the gray sky came a large shadow. Daisuke looked up and wondered dazedly, _Is this how Dark looks like when he falls?_

The black shadow swept him in his arms and he closed his eyes, letting Wiz carry him all the way back home.

* * *

"I've always been cold," Krad whispered to the ceiling. "Why is now so different?"

He felt another shiver run over his numb body. He was barely dressed, lying half-naked on the floor, the blankets and heavy quilt entangled with his limbs. His blond hair fell like grass over the white sheets, dead grass. He felt limp and he couldn't move.

"You didn't have to change," he said aloud but it sounded hollow. "You could have thought other things. It wasn't really love, of course it wasn't. It wasn't even like. Not even friendship.

But the voice inside him was tired and silent.

"It was just pity. A person like him is capable of pity. Of course he knew we're sick." He curled into a ball and thought of the kind smile, the soft touch. "The Niwa have always been warm. He is not an exception, is he? He is warm...but you can't let that touch you, Satoshi-sama. You can't."

He closed his eyes. His body was so weak and he coughed. He thought about Dark Mousy's voice and shuddered, feeling the numbness grow from his feet to his hands, fingers shaking as he twisted on the floor. "I'm all you need," he whispered. But, of course, nobody answered him.


End file.
